Found this terrible blog entry I wrote at the support group I found online 2 days before my 2nd surgery, when I got the implants removed. This was far before the worst was to come and it was already a nightmare. I had only had the implants for 5 weeks when I wrote this. I have always been a tough girl & this breaks my heart to see how weak I was.
Subject: Explant in 2 Days
Hey everyone - thanks for all the support i have gotten here.
this is terrible and i cant believe this happens to so many people.
this is the scariest thing to ever happen to me to lose my memory and
not know where i am half the time. i feel like i am five years old.
its like a fog is around me all the time and im dizzy. i keep wearing
the same clothes every day because im too dizzy to walk around the
room and find something else.
my arms ache with pain like my arm is broken and i cant do anything
about it and i can never remember where i put my purse.. i can barely
walk or even drive.
im scared to lose my job.. i need to make money so i can keep my
apartment and i need to be smart and have a memory to keep my job.
thats why i am so scared. its not like i have a cold. i
feel mentally terrible and slowed down and dizzy and i just really
need it to go away to feel normal.
i want to feel normal again. i hate being sick when i look fine on
the outside and nobody knows how bad i am suffering on the inside.
PLEASE KEEP REASSURING ME I WILL GET MY MEMORY BACK AND FEEL
BETTER. I HAVE ONLY HAD THESE IMPLANTS 5 WEEKS. I DONT WANT TO DIE. I
WANT TO GO TO MOVIES AND GO OUT AND TO EAT WITHOUT BEING
DIZZY. I WANT TO BE NORMAL AND GET MARRIED ONE DAY. I WANT TO MAYBE HAVE
KIDS. IM SO SCARED I AM NOT GOING TO GET THESE THINGS BECAUSE IM SO
MENTALLY FOGGY. PLEASE TELL ME I AM. PLEASE TELL ME IM GOING TO GET
BETTER. THIS IS ALL I THINK ABOUT AND I CANT SLEEP AT NIGHT.
my pre op is tomorrow.. my parents are coming with me to talk to the
doctor about how we want capsules out and drains and everything and to
send the implants to that doc in canada. he doesn't think they made me sick but i have no time to find anyone else. i talked to a lawyer today
who said a lot of women are reacting to my kind of implants - inamed. he said a lot get better quickly. it may be a leaky valve.
PLEASE PRAY FOR ME. I NEED CONSTANT REASSURANCE. MY MIND IS NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO HANDLE THIS AND KNOW ILL BE OK. I FEEL LIKE MY LIFE IS OVER.
I am a woman who became very ill from "safe" implants when I was 26. I wish someone had warned me about the real risks of breast implants, and I hope this helps other sick women find some answers.
